Kleptomania can’t be cured, but treatment may help.

Awesome.  This was the result I got when I did a search on it.  My youngest is starting to worry me with the odds and ends they end up with in their pockets, their cubby at school, tightly wound in their hands.  What do you have?  I ask.  Nothing, said with a sweet smile.  Seriously?  Manipulative and steals trivial items?  Do I have a pathological liar as well as a future hoarder?

I might be going to the extreme, but these are honestly the questions we ask ourselves constantly as parents.  The end question that always ends the conversation:  is it NORMAL?  What defines normal?  Who the eff knows.  But when it comes to my youngest, I start to wonder when they hoard food in their pockets after I swear up and down to their teachers that we DO feed our children, is: if it IS truly normal.

I know kids have quirky habits and things that get to them.  My eldest is OBSESSED with the smoke detectors.  This may have stemmed from the fact that when we were in our old house, the smoke detector would often go off because we had poor ventilation in our bathroom, and the detector was right outside of it.  Cue tears and side glances, in addition to hyperfocusing on it STILL, and it’s 3 years later.  But what really constitutes normal vs. abnormal?  Should I be worried that my kid won’t take their hands off of their ears when there is even the possibility of the smoke detector going off? (I had to change the batteries, and the intermittent beeping caused them to panic for the entire time.)

I can’t tell you if your kid is normal, because believe me, I haven’t a clue if mine are.  My kleptomaniac and pathological liar continues their plight through daycare with their latest story: “That car in my cubby?  Ms. ‘Ria (teacher) said it’s mine from home, so I need to bring it home.”  The teacher was standing right there, and tried to cover up their appalled nature by giggling nervously.  No, it was not ours and no, the teacher did not tell them that at all.  #Amazing.

 

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